"..making the best use of time"

I had a completely morbid dream a few nights ago.. I dreamt that I had to euthanize myself with some sort of lip balm because I was sick, and my family and friends were all sharing my last moments with me. I put the balm on early (and without giving my family any notice), then felt myself drift away slowly. Suddenly reality set in, and I regretted not cherishing any last moment I could have with the people who love me more than anything in the world. I started telling everyone how grateful I was to have shared life with them...but I hadn't put on enough of the balm to die. I got up, and went to the bathroom to pray. I didn't feel peace about dying anymore..not because I wasn't excited and secure about my eternity in heaven, but because my death was hurting people--the ones I hurt for when they feel any sort of pain..It was extremely unsettling.

Subconciously, I woke up singing Carl Cartee's "All things New" in my head.



"So we watch and we wait and we hope and we pray You will come and make all things new. And we won't be afraid as we hope for the day You will come and make all things new, all things new."

Today a friend of mine texted me Ephesians 5:15-16a - "Look carefully, then, how you walk--not us unwise but as wise, making the best use of time.."

Too often we drown in our own thoughts and concerns, shrugging off opportunities to love selflessly. This dream, and my leaving the country shortly encouraged me to evaluate the time d spent with my favorite people - my family and closest friends. If it was snatched away, would I be thankful with how I spent my time? Was I "present" when I hung out with them? Was I actively listening, laying my own burdens down to share theirs? Was I making peace? Was I intentional about spending quality time with them? Was I encouraging joy and laughter? Was I acknowledging the presence of God, and my part in His perfect design for their life?

Food for thought: We fb how much we love each other, but are we really loving??